X
Advanced Search
Search
HomeShout ItThrowing In the Towel

Shout It

Throwing In the Towel

Throwing In the Towel

Expelling a 4-year-old

by Toni (Mon Jan 11, 2010)
You May Also Like
What is Responsible Parenting?  by BeckiF
Mama and Paparazzi  by Susie H
Ambition is a Funny Thing  by Penny Gilbert
You Make Me Sick  by sarah
Southwest Baby Snatch  by LiveLady
I Don't Want to Be a Dinner Lady  by Penny Gilbert
Parenting Faux Pas  by Jean James
Parenting: It's as Simple as ABC - Part 2  by Very Bored in Catalunya
Why Are Children on the Pill?  by Rickie J
Parenting: It's as Simple as ABC - Part 1  by Very Bored in Catalunya

I read on Friday, about a 4-year-old boy in Croydon, England, who was expelled from his primary school as teachers could not cope with his 'challenging behavior.' I literally couldn't believe my eyes. Surely they must be talking about a 14-year-old? Apparently not.

The head teacher said he had 'constantly breached' the school's behavior code despite numerous efforts by teachers to help him. As any parent will tell you, when a child is having behavior problems, it can be a long, long process to reverse the patterns. By my reckoning, this child has probably been in school since September - hardly long enough to throw in the towel. Interestingly, four other pupils have previously been expelled from the school, and in all cases, including the current one, the decision has been reversed by the school governors.

My mother taught for decades and my sister is a school psychotherapist. I know only too well what teachers have to put up with and how limited they are in their options; I have also heard the horror stories about what happens to some kids when they go home. There are two sides to every story, but when you give up on a 4-year-old you're only sending him one message.

What do you think? 7 Opinions
Classic View
|
Expand All
Show:
Oldest First
|
Newest First
|
Most Popular First
Cancel

Please login before commenting and you'll be able to manage your comments.

Preview Submit
Jean James
Posted Mon Jan 11, 2010 at 3:00 pm Reply Delete
It sounds like the school 'behavior code' is pretty intense if a 4 year old can't cut it. I have this image of the head mistress with her hair pulled back in a tight bun, a hairy wart protruding from somewhere on her face, wearing black orthopedic shoes. Shouldn't four year olds be home with their moms playing candyland or something?Report Abuse
1 reply, Last reply by Kitty on Thu Jan 21, 2010 at 4:18 pm
Kitty
Posted Thu Jan 21, 2010 at 4:18 pm Reply Delete
@Jean James: Yay! A four year old should be mucking around at home with mum or dad. If there's a problem to that extent with a kid at school then there's a problem at home. It's the parents job to sort it out, not the teachers. Teachers teach facts. Parents had the child, they should do the rest.Report Abuse
Eleanor Patrick
Posted Tue Jan 12, 2010 at 1:08 pm Reply Delete
The trouble in the UK is that the teachers are tied up by rules and regulations as to what and how they can teach, so they have no time to address the reason behind unwanted behaviour – and my experience as a child therapist tells me there always is one. Any behaviour (adult or child) is a communication. I've met loads of teachers of this age group and beyond who understand that something needs investigating but they either don't know how to start or have no time to follow through. They do care though. Exclusion is almost a way to solve the tension.Report Abuse
1 reply, Last reply by Toni on Wed Jan 13, 2010 at 2:58 pm
Toni
Posted Wed Jan 13, 2010 at 2:58 pm Reply Delete
@Eleanor Patrick: Perhaps this situation will highlight the problem. I know my sister is one of the few school psychotherapists in her area and her case load is overflowing. It sounds like the head teacher is a bit trigger happy with the expulsion resort. This was his fifth one and they have all been reversed by the school Governors.Report Abuse
Josh
Posted Tue Jan 12, 2010 at 2:53 am Reply Delete
We had a kid in my son's preschool who was ultimately asked to leave (at 3 years old). He was hitting and biting the other children to the point where all the kids in the class were scared of him - it was both extremely disruptive and dangerous to the other children. Unfortunately, these situations are often the result of parenting issues at home and teachers have limited ability to overcome these serious behavioral problems on their own.Report Abuse
jo
Posted Mon Jan 11, 2010 at 6:53 pm Reply Delete
These teachers sound like bouncers at a velvet roped club. Drunk with power.Report Abuse
Cindi Pearce
Posted Mon Jan 11, 2010 at 4:38 pm Reply Delete
I love Mary's comment and insight. Any pre-schooler who can put a bunch of adults on their respective ears must be something quite extraordinary.Report Abuse
MaryH
Posted Mon Jan 11, 2010 at 3:57 pm Reply Delete
Any 4-year old that can come up with enough bad things to get expelled is OK with me. He must be brilliant. The school should recognize this and work on turning his obvious intelligence toward good not evil.Report Abuse
Philly
Posted Mon Jan 11, 2010 at 3:34 pm Reply Delete
Oh my! What a dreadful situation. It seems like there is no way a school should be doing this to a 4 yr old - but he must have been a little horror.Report Abuse

Talk To Us
Advanced Search Search

Graffiti to Go

A space for you to share your recommendations of sites, services and special things with other readers.

Most Read Most Commented