by Lady Macleod (Fri Mar 05, 2010)
I have had a
great life so far and I'm looking forward to more; I mean a great life - filled with hope,
disappointment, failure, success, adventure, danger, grief, bliss, sadness,
pain, love, and happiness. I can truthfully say that I have never been bored. I've
climbed mountains and had babies. I have felt the blackness of grief, as well
as the joy of love from more than one good man.
I've seen
great wealth up close and personal, and I've seen poverty that defies
description and that one cannot possibly grasp unless you live it. I found out
that poverty is not the lack of funds but the lack of hope; just as I found out
that happiness has nothing to do with money.
The most
amazing thing I discovered is that the secret of life (for me, because I could
be wrong. I've been wrong before. I didn't like it but...) is not
to find someone to love you but
rather to find someone you can love with your whole being, without reservation
or conditions.
I've had two
such loves - I told you, I've had a great life.
When I was young,
you know twenty-four-years-old-young, before your brain is fully formed - I
loved a boy with all my being, without reservation or condition. He loved me,
but he was young too. After two years he told me he didn't love me anymore and
I had to leave and so I did.
Thirty-four
years later I was sitting in my little house in Rabat, Morocco typing away on
the last few chapters of my first novel. I had a plan. I think it's important
to be flexible, but you need a plan. I had a plan. I was to finish the book by
the end of September; take a few weeks and go to the U.S. to visit my daughter
while editing; then to India and points north for the following six months
while hawking my book over the internet - I love the 21st century.
In the hottest days of August, as it can only be hot
in Africa, there appeared a note on my blog: ‘Crickett-PLEASE contact me' with an e-mail address that I
recognised as the one person I never expected to hear from again - the boy that
I had loved with all my heart those many years ago. I had given him a thought
now and again through the years, and just assumed that he was happy. Like I
said - I've been wrong before...
$5000 later on his mobile, and countless lengthy e-mails,
along with some (hold your breath here ladies) very good poetry written just
for me - I was sunk one more time. After the first couple of telephone
conversations it was as if we gently stepped right back into each other.
We agreed to meet in October, in Paris, for one week
to see if the ‘up close and personal' magic was still there.
‘Why did you tell
me you didn't love me? Why did you make me leave?'
‘Because I thought
there was one of you on every corner. I was wrong. I found out you are one of a
kind.'
My exact words to him were: ‘If you want me Pilgrim, this time you
have to come and get me.' And he did, and it was better than before!
After a romance-filled week in Paris that confirmed
what we knew, what we had hoped; a week where I found that I loved the man even
more than I had loved the boy, and he discovered I was what he had been looking
for all along - he asked me to ditch my plane ticket to India and come home with
him to Texas. I did. We were married a month later. More than a year later, I
can tell you it is better than the fairy tale.
