by Janie Emaus (Thu Aug 06, 2009)
It used to be that a hot guy could turn my body upside down, filling me with anxiety and making it hard to think straight. As the adrenaline rushed through my veins, my heart would pump loudly and I'd forget what I was trying to say, mumble something incoherent and hope that my smile was getting to him the same way he was getting to me.
Nowadays, I still have anxious moments where my adrenaline pumps quickly and my heart pounds loudly. I quite frequently lose my train of thought, not to mention a particular word. And I often mumble incoherently, causing those around me to think I've entered early Alzheimer's.
Unfortunately, this time around, it's not because of a hot guy, but the result of a hot flash - one of the symptoms of out-of-whack hormones. And I can no more control these raging hormones than I could tame the ones that raged when I was a teenager.
Back then I was taking my clothes off for something fun. Now I'm shedding layer by layer for survival.
For those of you who have not yet reached the hot flash zone, let me tell you how it is:
The heat starts from deep inside your body, and begins slowly to creep out of your pores, drenching your neck and forehead. It can be subtle at first. You might think it's just an extremely warm day, although no one else seems to be experiencing this ‘summer effect.' You may attribute it to having just eaten hot, spicy food or to walking too fast on the treadmill.
Once it passes, you're left with a slight chill and several seconds of reorientation as your body returns to normal. And with the hope that it won't happen again.
But there is no fooling yourself once they arrive. No turning back. You're merging into a new lane on this highway of life and you've got to keep going forward.
There are a few remedies you can apply, but as of yet, I haven't found any real cure, only temporary solutions.
First, and most important, always dress in layers. Whether you're going walking along the beach, sitting in an air-conditioned restaurant or skiing down a black diamond mountain: think layers.
Second, there are pretty fans made from wood or plastic. You can purchase these to match your outfits or buy one for each day of the week, much like those little girl underpanties that we used to wear. Or if you're so inclined, you can buy one of the electrical fans. But here's a warning: the whirring noise will attract attention and it does often sound like a mini vibrator.
Third, you can take hormone pills of one variety or another. But the verdict still hasn't come in on the benefits of these.
And lastly, you could give up those activies known to trigger hot flashes.
In my case this would be all of my favorite things: coffee, my work-out sessions, fine wine and those extra-dry, extra-cold martinis. But these are also the things I share with my best friends. Women who relate completely to what I'm going through. Things I do not want to give up.
So, pass the fan and that bottle of wine...oh, here it comes...off with my sweater...
