by Lisa H. (Wed Nov 04, 2009)
Always the ones to be behind the times, my husband and I
finally ordered a DVR through our satellite company. I know, I know. What took
us so long?
Does every country have DVRs available? Or Digital Recording Devices or Digital
Voice Recorders or . . . what does the acronym stand for again? I don't even
know.
All I know is that the device records television shows when I'm not home and
even when I am home. This thing is so smart it can record one show while I'm
watching another. Additionally, I believe it can record two shows at the same
time, but I'm not sure. I'm afraid to try it.
Technology frightens me. Technology that is smarter than me truly frightens me,
which is why my cellphone, my digital camera and even my Weight Watchers scale,
have my stomach doing flip-flops. Have you ever seen the movie ‘I, Robot' with
Will Smith? People, believe it, robots and technology will take over the world
one day. Humans will be obsolete. Come over to the dark side of paranoia. The
clouds are pink here.
Before the DVR we had the VCR, which used video cassette tapes; big bulky
devices you can buy in the clearance bin at your local pharmacy now. The
shortcoming of the VCR was that you had to watch whatever you were recording,
while you were recording it. If your brother wanted to record ‘the game' for
example, you had to watch ‘the game' all night so that he could watch it later
when he got home from work.
If you turned the channel in the middle
of ‘the game' to watch 'Gilmore Girls,' Dumb Brother would totally know because
it would show up in the middle of the recording, right when Michael Jordan was
about to shoot a three-pointer. Not that any of this ever happened to me, of
course. I'm just sayin'.
So it's buh-bye, VCR. Hello DVR.
What's better than a machine that can record all the movies I can't watch when
my husband is home? Girl movies. Movies that make you cry. Movies about women
having babies and finding the love of their life. Movies featuring Daniel
Craig. The DVR even allows me to press the ‘slow motion' button when Daniel
Craig is walking out of the ocean in ‘Casino Royale.' Rewind. Slow motion
again. Rewind. Pause. Play. Paaauuse. Slow motion and pause again. You get the
idea.
As appealing as the DVR is for us women, my husband and I use the DVR most
often to record cartoons for our 3-year old. That way if he throws a fit
because one of his shows is not on at THAT VERY MOMENT, I can flip on the
fancy-dancy DVR and boom! There is his show. Instant babysitter.
It has also offered us an answer to cries of ‘Ag'in! Ag'in!' Now, he, and we,
can indeed watch it ‘ag'in!' Or he can watch it ‘ag'in' while I make dinner,
cut my toenails, read a book, clean up dog vomit, or read the DVR manual.
Oh. Here is the definition of a DVR. Right here, in the manual. After the
Spanish, French, German, Gaelic and Elven translations. Digital Video Recorder.
There you go. Now I know what it
stands for. If only I could figure out exactly how to use it.
